Before coming to a
decision, it is crucial to look at all angles to something. In this blog, we
have been focusing on looking at things from an objective side of view.
However, relationships always work if two people are willing to make it work.
That will to ‘never say die’ makes two people appreciate each other as they
are. Taking up all the advice you can is essential, but ultimately, the
decision lies with you.
Your feelings matter;
even before you think about going all ‘objective’ on your partner. Exiting a
serious relationship is not something you want to do when your judgment is
crowded by anger, and especially so, if there are children involved. There is
no litmus test to determine how far your relationship or marriage can go; the
decision is all up to you.
The point of this blog
is to give you a perspective on different ways you can look at a situation. So,
here we go.
Have you lost respect
for your partner?
Many couples lose their
grip when either one of the partners loses respect for the other. Maybe you
wake up one fine day and realize your partner isn’t motivated enough. Maybe
he/she just doesn’t want to fight for your love anymore. Maybe he/she doesn’t care
about the future anymore meaning he/she doesn’t want to work anymore. Maybe
he/she isn’t motivated about anything anymore. It is quite disheartening if
your partner turns to such behavior.
The long term reaction
will be to lose respect for your partner, and you don’t want that. When this
happens, your relationship will be nothing but fulfilling. It will be tiring
and you might blow a fuse when you least expect it. If your partner can’t keep
his/her promises, you will lose respect for them. If you are in such a
relationship, it might be time to call it quits, maybe take a break.
Self-destructive
behavior
Maybe your partner has
a behavior that seems dangerous or difficult. You go to work and you are afraid
your partner is out drinking, doing drugs, or gambling. If the problems are too
extreme to the extent that your partner cannot handle themselves, then it might
affect your relationship. Picking up an addictive, destructive behavior can
cause you to suffer greatly. Such partners who have destructive behavior are
wild cards. They are simply dangerous and unpredictable. Maybe it’s time to
call it quits.
Lost trust?
We have already talked
about trust and how fundamental it is in any relationship. A relationship
cannot do without trust. Some couples get over trust issues, some don’t. Trust
is so vital, that lack thereof can cause a relationship to end. If your partner
broke your trust either by cheating, revealing your secrets, or invading your
privacy, and you find it extremely hard to let it go, consider letting it go.
After some time trying to regain your trust and you feel as if it’s impossible
for your partner to do so, then you should consider calling it quits. Some
people lose trust and never regain it and such a relationship leads to a lot of
resentment. You don’t want that, now do you?
In conclusion
Relationships need
constant work. A relationship where none of you put in any effort is bound to
fail; and miserably so. Put in a little effort, if not much. Hug your partner,
kiss them, tell them they look good, take them out, have a laugh, have fun,
compliment them on something, commend their efforts to put a smile on your
face, surprise them once in a while, text in the middle of the day; you get the
drift. All this is not a waste of time. You are slowly watering the garden that
is your relationship.
On a lighter note, I
heard someone saying if your partner makes you mad and you are in a heated
argument, think of them like a baby. It sounds awkward, but it works! Don’t
overdo it though.
Let’s continue this in
the next article!
